


the joker and the jew

by evenroseshavethorns



Category: South Park
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Based on a Twenty One Pilots Song, Bisexual Kyle Broflovski, Bisexual Stan Marsh, Graphic Description, Insomnia, M/M, Male Wendy Testaburger | Wendyl Testaburger, Sleep Deprivation, Trans Character, Twenty One Pilots Reference
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-29
Updated: 2020-10-29
Packaged: 2021-03-09 00:09:32
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,015
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27265510
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/evenroseshavethorns/pseuds/evenroseshavethorns
Summary: University has never been easy, never.Kyle loved studying, since he wanted to become a lawyer like his father, or maybe a famous doctor that would find the cure of some mysterious disease.But there was only one problem that could disconcert him from his studies, make him fail and so shatter his dreams in pieces.And that one problem was the captain of the football team, better known as Stan Marsh, his super best friend and crush.Or the university style AU by me no one asked for.
Relationships: Kyle Broflovski/Stan Marsh, Stan Marsh/Wendy Testaburger
Kudos: 12





	the joker and the jew

**Author's Note:**

> hhh- okay i'm really hyped for the project I talked about in my previous one shot (the k2 one) but here you go, this style angst-ish one-shot I left a few times ago and finally finished! 
> 
> this won't be the last one shot I will do, so yeah, be prepared!

University has never been easy,  _ never. _

Kyle loved studying, since he wanted to become a lawyer like his father, or maybe a famous doctor that would find the cure of some mysterious disease.

But there was only one problem that could disconcert him from his studies, make him fail and so shatter his dreams in pieces.

And that one problem was the captain of the football team, better known as Stan Marsh, his super best friend and crush. 

He and Stan were really different, and people were amazed by seeing how well they got along.

Stan was the joker, the captain and quarterback of the football team and a complete sportsman. He could also be whiny sometimes, and got drunk most of the parties he went to. There was a time he entered an "emo" phase, that he soon left once he reached high school. And he had a boyfriend, Wendyl - who was trans and that helped Stan to embrace his bisexuality - and was never afraid of showing off to school with big shirts and flags and break someone's head if they dared to insult him or his boyfriend.

Kyle, on his side, was a complete opposite: he was seen like the nerd - even if he could break all your bones down if you made him upset - who avoided the crowds to find peace in the library. He wasn't really a party person, and those times he went there was only because Stan asked him multiple times, though he was never getting drunk. He never let go of his "jersey" side, but he showed it just a few times. He was still single, and was still in the closet, scared to come out as bisexual to his family and the whole university. 

_ Yes, two complete opposites. _

Kyle sighed as he continued reading the pages of his science book that he had to learn to pass that week's test. Sadly, he couldn't get to put that phrase inside his mind, knowing there wasn't any chance for him to get with the raven guy, and so couldn't remember almost anything from the chapter about exotic plants and their features. 

He could, however, scrabble and quickly doodle some writings and drawings of the person that filled his thoughts and mind, obviously covering it with little hearts and stars, just like any teenage boy or girl would do once in their life when they got a crush, while the song "Fallin' for You" of Colbie Caillat played from the earphones connected to his Spotify. 

And, as sudden as a flash, a raven head popped out of nowhere, pushing the book slightly down and giving the redhead a smile, and this last couldn't help but blush and fall backwards while letting out a little shout of surprise. 

The Jewish guy groaned, meanwhile the chuckle of his friend echoed in his ears and mind, adding more blush on the younger male's face. 

«Stan,  _ what the actual fuck _ » He frowned, taking the hand that was lent by the older guy in order for him to get up. He shoved some of the dust that landed on his clothes during the fall and rolled his eyes at the little apology of the joker, who was trying to hide his grinning face. 

«Sorry, dude, I didn't mean to scare you like that» The raven-haired stated, looking at the book that fell on the ground and picking it up, now staring at it with a confused look.

«Man, exotic plans? They really make you guys study strange things» He mumbled, and then his mind printed the image of Stan finding one of the scrabbles or the doodles he did. And that really scared and flustered him. So he quickly grabbed the book and closed it.

«I guess they do, but it's not so difficult to remember once you get it»  _ And once you stop constantly fantasising about your crush _ , he thought. There was a minute of pure and awkward silence between the two, until Stan noticed the earphones his friend had attached to the phone in his pocket.

«Dude, you have earphones? Oh, thank God, I forgot mine at the dorm. Mind if I take one?» He asked, sitting next to him as the younger male lent one of them to the other, and pressed play. As soon as he did that,  _ Anathema _ by TØP started playing. 

  
  


**_You will never know, what's behind my skull_ **

**_So won't you say goodnight, so I can say goodbye_ **

_ Kyle knew this. Every time, the thoughts that fulfilled his mind, behind his skull, where nobody could see and judge them, rolling like a ball, just as the Earth would go round and round the Sun, didn't let him sleep. Didn't let him talk or close his eyes. Didn't leave him in peace. _

**_You will never know, what's under my hair_ **

**_So won't you say goodnight, so I can say goodbye_ **

_ Kyle always hated his hair. At least, since 4th grade to 11th. He then slowly started to appreciate them. Stan, however, ever since they started 1st grade would say how cool his friend's hair was. But, of course, the raven-haired couldn't know the thoughts that hid under that red mass of curls that hunted his sleep. _

**_You will never know, what's under my skin_ **

**_So won't you say goodnight, so I can say goodbye_ **

_ Kyle had a problem with his skin. It was really pale, so mosquitos bites and infection and, of course, blush were easily visible. He always blushed a lot, and every time that Stan would point that out, the redhead would always find an excuse. But he could not find one that could explain his incapacity of sleeping, besides the harsh truth.  _

**_You will never know what is in my veins_ **

**_So won't you say goodnight so I can say goodbye_ **

_ Of course, his blush was caused by the blood that pumped in his veins by the heart that beat in his chest when Stan was close to him, said something or even slightly touched him. The blood would pump even during the night, once again, not giving him the chance to get to close his eyes. _

**_Won't you go to someone else's dreams_ **

**_Won't you go to someone else's head_ **

**_Haven't you taken enough from me_ **

**_Won't you torture someone else's sleep?_ **

_ Stan.. Stan was the one that always haunted his dreams - the few times he actually got some sleep. No matter how hard he tried to send those thoughts away, to send  _ **_him_ ** _ away.. he could never achieve that. He could only stand and watch, just like a distant spectator, as his best friend took all energies from his body and mind, and tortured him in and out of his sleep. _

**_And you will never know what I'm thinking of_ **

**_So won't you say goodnight so I can say goodbye_ **

_ But he won't know. Kyle promised himself that Stan would never know the cause of his lack of sleep or which thoughts rolled and tortured his mind. He didn't deserve it, he shouldn't, wouldn't and couldn't let Stan know. Not then, nor now, nor never. _

**_And you will never understand what I believe_ **

**_So won't you say goodnight so I can say goodbye_ **

_ But he still believed. He still hoped that day would most likely never arrive, where Stan would come and tell him how he understood that he loved him, how he understood how blind he had been and how he understood he would never leave him. But, of course, Stan would have never understood. And Kyle's endless nights would still continue, non-stopped and suffered. _

«Kyle.. why are you crying?» The voice of his friend arrived on the redhead's ears as he understood the raven stopped the song. He didn't even notice the tears that streamed down his face. He quickly wiped them away, sighing deeply.

«it's nothing, Stan.. it's fine» He simply whispered, as the other approached him and stood in front of him.

«don't try and avoid the problem again, Kyle. I'm your best friend, for fuck's sake!» He harshly said, looking at him. Noticing the other wouldn't look at him, he took the first move and lifted his chin with his hand. At that point, Kyle couldn't do anything but cry and snuggle on the other's shoulder, sobbing quietly. The older boy was strained away by this reaction, but simply caressed his head and hair. 

After a few minutes, Kyle backed away and looked inside the raven's eyes. They gazed at each other for a long time, until the older guy made their lips crush gently. The redhead's eyes widened as he stood there still until the other male's lips left his. 

Stan stood there until reality crushed over him and the realisation of what he just did hit him like a truck, covering his mouth and blushing hardly.

«Oh shit, I'm so sorry, dude! I don't know what came over me, my mind just blanked and I-»

«It's fine» he said, both their eyes widened for the shock. «it's fine» He repeated.

Stan stayed there, still. He couldn't believe what just happened and, most of all, he couldn't believe it was real. But, anyway, knew what he had to do.

And so, the next day, when he spotted Kyle standing next to his locker, with a guilty expression on his face, he headed towards him and hugged his friend, making the books the redhead was holding fall miserably on the floor. The younger male, at first surprised, turned and his face changed from flustered to disappointed.  _ Fair reaction _ , Stan thought. 

«what do you want?» He asked, while the raven boy bit his bottom lip. He hugged him again, sighing deeply. 

«Stan, wha»

«I broke up with Wendyl» He said, then sighed deeply. Kyle stood there, his eyes widened. He just heard that.  _ Stan wasn't with Wendyl anymore.  _ They backed up from the hug, and the younger male stared into the other's eyes.  _ Those beautiful eyes that had kept him awake every night.  _

He stated still, silent, then his face showed an expression of sadness and guilt, and he covered his face with his hands, letting out a few sobs and murmuring how this was all his fault, that Stan didn't have to do that and now everything was ruined. 

And what could the older guy do, if not feeling sad for his friend and hugging him once again? But, no matter how much he craved for this, Kyle just  _ couldn't.  _ He tried to break free from the joker's hold, shaking his head and repeating that this couldn't happen, that this wasn't right and that he didn't want it to be like this through his whimpers. 

But he soon gave in, and hugged the raven back as this last gently caressed his hair, whispering a gentle  _ "shh"  _ in his ear as the jewish boy calmed down. «It wasn't your fault» He reassured him, kissing his forehead.

«You loved him» The red-haired male stated under his breath, sniffing a few times. Stan sighed and said something that shook every part of Kyle's body.

_ «Not anymore» _

They stared into each other's eyes for a long time.  _ What did he mean by "not anymore"?  _ The hebrew asked himself. Maybe he was lying.  _ Yeah, it had to be like that: he was just joking around. He still loved Wendyl. He didn't love him.. _

.. _ but then why?  _ his eyes slowly started watering again.  _ Why were his eyes so sincere and true while saying that? _

The dark-haired smiled sadly, holding the other closer. 

_ «You're the one I love, Kyle» _

That was the last drop. The younger guy couldn't take it anymore and burst in tears, while hiding his face on the raven's shoulder. He eventually calmed down again, whimpering softly as the hand of the other brushed gently his hair once again. And so they stayed there for a few minutes, until Kyle let out those seven words that he waited to say for all that time and, with them, his biggest burden on his back, heart and mind.

_ «You're the one I love too, Stan» _

**Author's Note:**

> thank you for reading, kudos and comments are appreciated as always ♡ 
> 
> also, I will post later today a creek one-shot commemorating their 5th anniversary and maybe the other days of the creek week (and yes, i'm late for both of them, so I gotta rush :") ) 
> 
> again, thank you for reading this and stay tuned for my next works <3


End file.
